It is raining. Oh I hate rainy days lately. It somehow just makes me feel moody and lazy.
Sometimes, the more you want to know, the more the truth will be painful to you. Agree?
Actually we know this theory long time ago, however there are just these kind of moments when we desperately want to know what is actually happening behind all these confusions and chaos. And when someone finally reveal it or you are so "lucky" to have found out yourself, that is when our sufferings start. I personally hate this feeling.
Yea, my fault. I can just blame myself for being so curious. The saying 'curiosity kills the cat' is so true after all. Arrghh stupid me silly me!
Looking ahead, I realize that my future is so bleak, so unstable. I can no longer forsee myself in 2 years time. I cannot even see myself in half year time. That is a bad sign. *sigh*
Sometimes, when the thing that you once placed as the top priority in your heart is suddenly gone, it is just very hard for you to adjust yourself accordingly. I guess I am having a hard time adopting to my new life or maybe I am still lost in the forest. LOL
I noticed that I have lost enthusiasm towards many things. Why is this happening? Because I have entered my 20's? Because I just lost someone important? I do not know. I do not have the answer with me.
Life is filled with ups and downs. If you only live with either ups or downs, then your life is not interesting at all. Without downs, you will not truly understand the feelings of being really happy and appreciate the moments. Without ups, you will not know that after sadness, there will always be a rainbow waiting for you.
Guess I am no longer the little cute girl who just stepped into university. That is why I have lost my spell of charm and am being left alone at a side, waiting for the dark clouds around me to disappear.
Is there a rainbow waiting for me after this storm? I am sure there is, just that I cannot see it now.
Mine will definitely be much more beautiful than this.
-sherril=xuele-
