DEAD

I am gonna be so DEAD tomorrow. Yeah, tomorrow 1st of March 2009!!

LOL

Tonight surely will have some weird nightmare about me playing badminton.

Haih, I am taking part in tomorrow's badminton competition for Sports Carnival, organized by UTAR Sports Club. I will be playing doubles, partnering my dear cousin Shyuan. SHE WAS THE ONE WHO kinda FORCED ME IN!

Haha ok la just joking. She did not force, but oh well, she wanted to play so much and the officer Mr Alvin was urging us to play so I have no choice but to give in. You know why he wanted us to take part? Hmm... because initially there were only 2 girls' teams, so..... yeah that is why I am now in it.

Arrggghhhhh~~~!! Tension man!

Imagine, a noob player like me partnering a pro player like Shyuan. How can you be not tension? I will surely memper'siasui'kan myself and also most importantly, memper'siasui'kan her standard. LOL.

I always have DOUBLE tension when I play doubles. I will always think, "I must not play like shit because I am NOT playing alone. If I play like shit I will 'hai' my partner. But then I am so lousy for sure I will make my partner lose points."

Yeah that was what I used to think way back in high school when I played in tennis tournaments. Results? Ha, I was super tension and played like shit.

I am not someone who can play in competitions. Last time when I was still playing tennis, I could play quite ok when I was training with friends. But when it came to tournament time, haha everything went upside down and I did super lots of unforced errors. Why? Because the thought of competition made me tension.

You want me to treat tournament like training. No way. I tried and failed. Haih.

If *he* is there to support me surely I will feel better. But now we are no longer together, impossible for that to happen. *sigh*

The worst thing is, Mr Alvin puts high hope on us because as you know, my cousin is a pro player. Kandas la. Mr Alvin, I am sorry I think I will disappoint you =(

To think back, I only joined once in badminton competition and that was when I was only in Standard 6. OMG!!!! Now I do not even really know how to calculate the points and stuffs =_=''

You know what some people told me?

"Aiya join la. No need to worry, Shyuan will cover up for you. She's so pro."

Yeah definitely she will need to cover up for me. But don't you think that from what that person said, he was actually hinting me that I am not a good player?

Yeah I admit I am NOT. And I have NEVER said I am good. NEVER.

Plus today my classmate told Shyuan that when I play badminton I look funny and ugly. FINE. I also know that.

I just wish that tomorrow will not turn out as bad as I thought.

Will *you* be supporting me or you do not even give a damn about it?

Whichever it is, I still miss you. I miss you!!!!!!

-sherril=xuele-